I read a meme today. 
It’s intentions were noble. I think it was trying to point out that sexuality, gender, race and religion did not matter to the author but the sentence that exploded at me was something like, “it’s simple, if your nice to me, I’ll be nice to you.” Yeah….. So….. Here’s the thing……
It’s wicked easy to be nice to those who are nice to us, the work, and I mean “inside work” , growth, development, is in being nice to those not so nice to us. We are all so afraid of losing something by practicing empathy. The inside work creates an environment for facing those fears and getting real about the stories we tell ourselves and the things we make stuff mean. It’s the inside work that teaches self honor and boundaries within a heart of compassion and empathy. 
I hear people saying things like, “there’s no excuse for _____”, you fill in the blank, selfishness, explosive outburst, being rude, whatever and yet for each person who would lay down these hard rules of judgment I can promise you that I can find someone else that has witnessed what they perceived as the very same quality coming from the source of “There’s no excuse for ___”. I see it myself, many times. 
Our species and our planet are in need of the inside work. Our physical borders overlap, our needs spread far and wide. Our plot has shifted and our characters will have to as well. 
Hope springs eternal and I see it! I see it happening! I’ll keep looking inside. It just feels better!! Don’t you think? Well, eventually anyway. Inside work does bring it’s own set of disturbance for sure but with an end game, with a light at the end of the tunnel. 

2 Comments

  1. Maya Northen on October 13, 2015 at 2:22 pm

    I agree with this whole-heartedly. I was talking about this to someone the other day from the Mental Health standpoint, because at times, those of us who suffer can, in our states of depression/anxiety/mood cycling, can be not super nice to others at times. The person said, "I like you when you're nice to me." I had to explain why sometimes good/nice people can be not so nice, and that really, I would prefer them to just like me bad days and all.

  2. Mitzi Sackett on November 8, 2015 at 5:12 pm

    Absolutely, Maya! Thank you so much for your contribution and input. It is the very definition of acceptance isn't it. We kind of got lost in thinking that healthy boundaries and self protection somehow swings the pendulum too far to the one side. We can BOTH set boundaries, speak our needs and love and accept. All at the same time!

    This is one of my most favorite quotes and comes from the movie Juno:

    “In my opinon, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.”

    =)

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